Mr. Cork's Totally Off the Wall Whacked Out Christmas Songs, Mr. Cork (self-issued)

Unlike the folks who sold us the Iraq war, Mr. Cork will never be accused of misleading anyone with the title of this 2003 CD. It's novelty all the way, and probably isn't for everyone, though it's not quite as far beyond the pale as, say, John Valby's holiday disc. It's basically homemade pop rock with fairly obvious drum machines and attitude substituting for talent on the vocals, but there are some fair giggles here. Mr. Cork definitely isn't speaking to the medical marijuana crowd with "Roll Me a Big Ass Joint for Christmas," "The Christmas Tattoo" brings us an ode to "Merry Christmas to you" plastered on his butt, and he's kind of glad "My Wife Left Me for Santy Claus." "Diarrhea on Christmas Day" could probably have done without the extended spoken word parts, as it was funny enough on its own. But Chipmunks fans will get a kick out of "The Squirrels Go Beserk at Christmas," and you'll quickly understand why "I Got Messed Up at Christmas," though you won't want everyone to hear. And "A Recycled Christmas Story" discusses the re-gifting phenomenon in somewhat different terms. Not bad, but some of this probably could have stood to bake a little longer.